My tangent on a Thursday morning. . .

College is going to shit. Not doing so well, and no matter how I attack my courses, it seems I'm destined to get a bad grade. Ughhh, I've already signed up for my spring semester classes, but I don't know if I'll be able to pass my Fall classes. Pretty depressed right now. . .and my video games and booze are my outlets. . .except now they are my hindrance towards school. Can't wait till Thanksgiving break, but at the same time I don't want to go forward. . .I want to go back and restart. How can anyone expect happiness today? American Dream? Those are for the people not living here, Americans live in a nightmare. . .everyday we either go to school, or work. We pay pay bills, or soon pay off loans in the $100,000. . .Our society grows ever closer to those fucked animes we watched so much back then and thought it would be awesome and adventurous to live in...now. . .I'm more fearful of the future. . .I'm fearful for you guys and my family. Our government doesn't exist, our education about the future and our expectations don't exist. I'm not being pessimistic here, I'm honestly a realist. . .or is that another term for pessimists taht act like optimists? Why did we wanna grow up so fast in a world where dreams have become shitty TV shows and hot, twisted minded, deprave celebs flaunting their vices in front of millions for attention and money. What happened to the hard working Americans? The innovators? The role models? America has yet to see a true statesmen since FDR! Our politicians and government officials are all demagogues or at least controlled by them. When did capitalism become so one sided and distorted? Barack Obama was a Illinois Senator and never once did anything in Congress except speak at a speech conference for a charity. . .and he was suppose to bring change? Why don't Americans care? We are too busy dealing with out own problems on the homefront, than to look some what decent to the rest of the world and offer a dollar to help. The EU is on the verge of collapse with Italy showing signs of economic instability and if the EU goes? What next? Sometimes I wonder. . .what the hell were we thinking? WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING!? WHY WHY GODAMMNIT WHY!? Here's my beer can to all you guys, I miss you and I wish. . .things never changed.