Life So Far -- Alien remix.

In theory I'd be spending the rest of my life doing whatever I wanted to, primarily kicking ass and taking names. However, reality has an uncanny way of putting a ginormous fireproof blanket over the flames of my life's passion. (But seriously, I couldn't ever really kick ass or take names. I don't even know what that saying means. Shouldn't I know the dude's name prior to the ass-kicking event? How else would I know if it's the right guy?)

So for now, I'm on my fourth year of a two-year community college program, simply because I'm awesome like that. I'm intending to transfer eventually, probably ending up at SIU-Carbondale because they have a degree in Computer Science (which is my intended major) and also a kickass creative writing program (which is the other major I'm going to get just because I want it).

In a perfect world, I'd be a really cool high school English teacher. However, since everybody and their mother wishes to be an English teacher, and even though I'd probably get a job because I actually am good at English unlike other people who I've met who have teaching certification in high school English, I'm probably going to end up doing some sort of IT/network security thing. Or I might blog for the rest of my life. Whatever. As long as I'm happy, can feed my people and pay the bills, I'm okay.

Also I'm a manager at a video game retailer. I love my job 90% of the time, simply for the fact that I very much love the people I work with. They're awesome. Also because I know just enough about video games to bullshit my way through any conversation on the topic and make it sound like I'm a veritable retail genius (which I am totally not). I hope that if I transfer I'll be able to keep some semblance of my job when I'm at school.

So, to recap:
IN MY BRAIN: I kick ass and take names.
IN REALITY: What the fuck does that even mean?

IN MY BRAIN: Awesome English teacher.
IN REALITY: Jesus Christ, am I ever going to leave community college?

IN MY BRAIN: I can sell ice to an Eskimo.
IN REALITY: I could probably weird the Eskimo out enough that he'll just get the ice so that I'd leave him alone.